dmg
When my son was very little my parents gave him a cheap bucket of plastic trucks, trains and boats. It's just a dollar-store toy but he's probably gotten more play out of these things than anything else he has.
However, he has recently figured out that some of them will hook together. This is a source of enormous frustration for him - partly because the little hook/hole deal is a little bit too small for him to manipulate. But also because they are kind of loose, so if he brings a few to me and I hook them together for him, as soon as he starts pushing them along, they fall apart.
Also, by design, some of the vehicles don't attach to each other (you can't hook the train engine to the steam shovel or a boat to a helicopter for example.) This drives him insane - he'll push two pieces that cannot be attached at me and get very, very frustrated when I can't join them.
This toy is now responsible for several fusses a day and I can't quite decide what to do. Should I just let him struggle with it, hoping that he will work out how to attach them or figure out that some cannot be attached? Should I collect them all while he's sleeping and put them away until he has more dexterity? Or should I try and replace it with a more well-made toy of a similar concept that he CAN actually attach and WILL stay together?
For the last idea, I am interested in suggestions of toys that you know of that do a similar thing, but in a less frustrating manner.
Answer
We have a set of Nerf foam dart guns that became Toddler Toys. It was great for him to play with until he realized that they're supposed to be pulled back to shoot the darts. He's not strong enough to pull them back himself and was always running up to us every 3-4 seconds to pull it back so he could shoot. Frustrating for both of us, so I put them away. We still play with them during "Mommy is giving you her undivided attention to play" times, but I'll only pull them out then since it's too frustrating other times.
My thoughts right now are that he has plenty of things that frustrate him on a daily basis, he has no control over it, and I have very little. If I can remove some frustration for him, that's okay.
If your son would be happy with them just staying together, though, you could add some sticky tac or something similar to help them attach and stay. I know then you'd have another set of "don't eat that" frustration, but if it's helping his toys act how he thinks they should, maybe he won't try?
I do understand the point of "not everyone is going to go through lengths to keep them from being frustrated and just teach him", but some things are just not age appropriate expectations.
We have a set of Nerf foam dart guns that became Toddler Toys. It was great for him to play with until he realized that they're supposed to be pulled back to shoot the darts. He's not strong enough to pull them back himself and was always running up to us every 3-4 seconds to pull it back so he could shoot. Frustrating for both of us, so I put them away. We still play with them during "Mommy is giving you her undivided attention to play" times, but I'll only pull them out then since it's too frustrating other times.
My thoughts right now are that he has plenty of things that frustrate him on a daily basis, he has no control over it, and I have very little. If I can remove some frustration for him, that's okay.
If your son would be happy with them just staying together, though, you could add some sticky tac or something similar to help them attach and stay. I know then you'd have another set of "don't eat that" frustration, but if it's helping his toys act how he thinks they should, maybe he won't try?
I do understand the point of "not everyone is going to go through lengths to keep them from being frustrated and just teach him", but some things are just not age appropriate expectations.
Toddler is pulling hair, any suggestions?
libramoon9
My daughter will be two in September. I am a stay at home mommy who does daycare. I only watch one other child who is 3 months younger than my daughter and is also a girl. The one I watch has taught my daughter some bad behaviors like pushing, pulling, throwing things at her (mt daughter's) head and jerking toys out or her (my daughter's ) hands. I have been watching this child since she was 3 months old and so my daughter and her have been around each other since then. I know at this age it is a little hard to teach sharing and stuff, but just recently my daughter has been getting really frustrated and upset with the other child acting the way she does with her and she has started grabbing her hair and pulling it. On the one hand I feel like she is sticking up for herself when the other child is so aggressive, but I know this is not a good behavioral trait for either child. I have done child care for 5 years and I usually only come across the sharing issue, so I am not quite sure how to deal with this. Any suggestions?
Answer
I worked in an inhome daycare for a litle while. My first job. You cant let this little girl acting with these sort of behaviors, such as pushing, pulling toys out of her hands, & whatever else she's doing. It's not okay at all, nor is it okay that your daughter is pulling hair. Whenever you see her doing this take her hand, spank it(not too hard of course) & tell her that it's not okay and tell her that she's going to bed in the crib. This is practicing timeouts. Toddlers hate timeouts. They may be just babies, but they learn this way. You have to be in control of them. They cant be in control of you, or else these behaviors will continue.
I worked in an inhome daycare for a litle while. My first job. You cant let this little girl acting with these sort of behaviors, such as pushing, pulling toys out of her hands, & whatever else she's doing. It's not okay at all, nor is it okay that your daughter is pulling hair. Whenever you see her doing this take her hand, spank it(not too hard of course) & tell her that it's not okay and tell her that she's going to bed in the crib. This is practicing timeouts. Toddlers hate timeouts. They may be just babies, but they learn this way. You have to be in control of them. They cant be in control of you, or else these behaviors will continue.
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